Tag: newsletter 2014

Writing Lessons from ‘The Simpsons’ (II)

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Of all the characters on the show, Lisa Simpson should be the one most capable of writing a book. Even though she’s only eight, she’s smart, academically gifted and she has a good command of language. When the time comes, though, and she has her opportunity, things don’t go as expected.

In the episode The Book Job (season twenty-three, episode six), Lisa and her father, Homer, discover that publishing agencies use ghost writers to churn out best-selling books, mostly in the young-adult genre.

Homer immediately sees dollar signs and he puts together a team, promising them a cut of the money. Lisa is appalled at both the manipulation of the readers and Homer’s mercenary attitude. She decides to write her own book, believing that a person should write for the love of the story, not money. While Homer’s team is busy writing, however, Lisa does the following:

• Puts on music for inspiration;
• Organises her CD collection;
• Plays game after game of online Boggle;
• Goes to write in a coffee shop, but instead spends her time setting up the wi-fi and buying coffee;
• Builds an intricate structure from wooden pencils;
• Watches cat videos;
• Obsesses over a smudge on the window before cleaning the entire pane, inside and out;
• Watches all five seasons of Friday Night Lights.

I love this episode and laugh every single time because I very much see myself in Lisa. How many excuses and distractions did I come up with to avoid writing? How many pointless activities did I pursue instead of sitting down and writing? Too many, I’m afraid. My all-time favourite is abandoning work to try and find out what dust was made of. The runner-up is writing my name on the underside of my stapler with white correction fluid…because then if someone broke into the house and stole my stapler, they wouldn’t be able to sell it? I don’t know, it seemed important at the time.

The lesson of this episode is two-fold. First, the only way to write is to sit down and write. Homer’s team did just that. Yes, they were purely motivated by profit. Yes, their story was basically a by-the-numbers supernatural mystery. But they did the work. They created their characters, put together a plot, and then sat down and wrote.

Second, we need support, especially if we’re writing on our own. Homer’s team did have it a little easier, and not just because Neil Gaiman brought them food. They worked as a group, and were able to keep each other focused and on track. I do wonder whether Lisa would have written her story if she’d had just one sympathetic person to support her.

You might write on your own but you’re not alone. Turn to someone if you need help or a sympathetic ear. You can even write to me if you want. I’ll help if I can and be honest if I can’t. And remember that if there’s one constant in this world, it’s that there will always be distractions. They’re not going anywhere. If you ignore them and write, you’re a success, whether you make money or not.

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This week’s prompts

Use the following prompts to start a new piece, continue an existing one, or to just have fun with words:

1. A wooden stake…
2. “What’s that on your head?” said…
3. The staircase spiralled…
4. Colourful cushions galore!
5. The pond wasn’t filled with water but…

Questions? Suggestions? Feel free to drop me a line at zee@twomarshmallows.net. You can also follow or contact me via Facebook, Linked In, YouTube or Tumblr.

Writing Lessons from ‘The Simpsons’ (I)

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I’ve found DVD commentaries to be an excellent source of reassurance and comfort. Every time the writers talk about their process, I’m reminded that I really don’t have to worry so much. Whether you like The Simpsons or not, the insight and advice offered by the people who create the show is of immense value to anyone who writes.

Writing Lessons from The Simpsons

If you’ve ever watched The Simpsons, you’ll know the show contains a large number background jokes. Each episode, particularly the earlier ones, contains funny signs, clever book and movie titles, and bizarre product names. In addition to being humorous, they often contain a sly and accurate observation on the subject they are parodying.

I used to envy the writers so much for their talent and insight. There was no way I could be as clever and witty. I told myself they must be extra smart or have special comedy training to do what they do, and that I would never measure up. When DVD’s became widely available and I was able to listen to the commentaries, I found out that I was wrong.

During the commentary for the season one episode ‘There’s No Disgrace Like Home’, one of the writers, Mike Reiss, said this:

“The funny signs you see in the background on The Simpsons are come up with by the writers and again, often an hour or two is spent to come up with a two-second sign joke.”

It took a while for the importance of this line to sink in. Once it did, it changed my thinking completely. The deciding factor wasn’t talent or training. It was time. It took an hour or two for an entire team of writers – not just one person, but a team – to create those background jokes I loved so much. This is a sentiment that is repeated throughout the commentaries from seasons one to ten (which is as far as I’ve got).

It’s true that many of the writers do have formal training or many years of experience in their field, or both. That doesn’t negate the reality that what they do takes time. That was the secret of their success. Instead of worrying so much about how I wasn’t as good as other people, I needed to spend more time revising my work.

This is not to say that funny or clever lines can’t come to you quite quickly, because they can and do. For the times they don’t, though, remember to be patient with yourself. If it takes a team of writers an hour or two to perfect a two-second sign joke, then it’s logical that it’ll take you just as long to craft something special. And that’s okay.

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This week’s prompts

Use the following prompts to start a new piece, continue an existing one, or to just have fun with words.

1. The fish broke through the surface…
2. The heavily-laden branch…
3. Hasty scribbles on the…
4. Bricks flew in every direction…
5. “I always add glitter to my magic spells,” said…

Questions? Suggestions? Feel free to drop me a line any time at zee@twomarshmallows.net. You can also follow or contact me via Facebook, Linked In, YouTube or Tumblr.

Unpopular

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My apologies for the delay in posting. I’ve been working on creating audio versions of each newsletter. It took a little while to figure out the software, but the first two videos are finally complete and will be posted shortly. In the meantime, please enjoy this week’s newsletter.

Unpopular

 My intuitive painting instructor once gave an interview to a regional newspaper. This is what she had to say about her classes:

“Intuitive painting is painting what spontaneously comes up from within you. The classes are not very popular because many people are frightened of intuitive painting. You get to know yourself quite well through this form of art.”¹

My first reaction was surprise. I assumed she’d talk up her business and try to get more students, but my teacher told the truth for two reasons. First, she’s a truthful person. Second, she wants students who are willing to take the unpopular path. Some people will show up for one lesson and never return. Others will try, but they focus on making their painting attractive (whatever that means to them) rather than daring to paint what they truly want to paint. They become frustrated with the class and quit.

I understand their fear very well. Creative endeavours can be scary. They require a lot of courage, and it can take several attempts before someone makes their breakthrough. So many people give up because they don’t want to get to know themselves. No one wants to admit that they’re frightened. No one wants to admit that they’re embarrassed by their work, or that they’re worried about what other people will think of them.  Feeling that way means you’re shallow and vain, right? It’s much easier to not even try in the first place.

I know this feeling because I’ve been there. You don’t have to stay there, though. Not if you take the unpopular path. I have seen the results with my own eyes. I saw the work of the women who came to class every week. I saw them bloom and grow, moving from being embarrassed to being excited to share their work with the class. We’ve all created intricate, vivid pieces, filled with emotion that leapt off the page. We went from being anxious to a willingness to challenge ourselves, and be honest about our feelings and experiences. Our paintings aren’t always pretty. A few of mine freaked everyone out. But our work is always honest. It has depth and it resonates. It is truthful. When our paintings are both pretty and truthful, they take everyone’s breath away.

The popular option is to give up. But it’s the unpopular path that yields results. Take a step on that path today.

 

  1. NoordHollands Dagblad, 20 April, 2012; Halte Ijmond.

 

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This week’s prompts

Use the following prompts to start a new piece, continue an existing one, or to just have fun with words.

1. Snapping back with resilience…

2. Red, plastic and tough…

3. Loofah birthday surprise!

4. “Guess what I bought today,” said…

5. The silver tin gleamed…

Questions? Suggestions? Feel free to drop me a line at zee@twomarshmallows.net. You can also follow or contact me via Facebook, Linked In, YouTube or Tumblr.

Pick Two

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The audio version of this newsletter can be found here.

Pick Two

All of us, no matter who we are, want our products and services to be three things: good, fast, and cheap. It’s not possible. So we pick two.

This applies to writing as well. We all want to produce high quality texts in a short amount of time and while expending the least amount of energy. It’s not going to happen. Thankfully, the solution is easy: pick two.

Fast and cheap: This is a good option for first drafts, when you’re overthinking the writing process, or when you’re procrastinating. Choosing ‘fast and cheap’ means you are going to sit down and write without worrying about quality. In this way, you can complete a piece relatively quickly and without expending too much energy. Once you’ve got that first draft, then you can revise it so it meets your standards.  At this moment, though, your focus is on getting results.

Fast and good: This option is for the writer’s equivalent of the final sprint towards the finish line. Your piece (or a section of your piece) is nearing completion and you want to get it done as soon as possible. So you set aside a block of time for revising and editing, during which you will do nothing but focus on quality. It can be a very intense experience and it requires a fair amount of energy, which is why it won’t be cheap. But it will be worth it.

Cheap and good: Slow and steady wins the race. This is the option most suited to medium- or long-term projects. Time isn’t of the essence, but consistency is. You achieve results by doing a small amount every day. Writing this way will require patience and dedication, but it’s an inexpensive way of producing a text. That small amount you do every day will add up to so much more. Since you have the time to craft the piece, you can relax and focus on getting the words right, instead of getting them done right now.

 

Whenever you’re feeling frustrated with your writing because you want it all this instant, just remember that the solution is easy. Pick two. Then get to work.

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This week’s prompts

Use the following prompts to start a new piece, continue an existing one, or to just have fun with words.

1. Oh no you did just not…
2. “This will require the removal of my earrings,” said…
3. The purple blanket covered…
4. The system stalled…
5. Time flew by and…

Questions? Suggestions? Feel free to drop me a line any time at zee@twomarshmallows.net. You can also follow or contact me via Facebook, Linked In, YouTube or Tumblr.

Conspiracy Theory

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Happy New Year to everyone following the Gregorian calendar! I’ve started a fortnightly newsletter for anyone who, like me, enjoys writing and needs a little boost now and again. Each newsletter is short, so as to encourage writing and not spending too much time on the internet. There are also a few prompts at the end to get you started. Enjoy!

 

The audio version of this newsletter can be found here.

Conspiracy Theory


When I first saw the word ‘pronoia’, I thought it was a typo. It turns out that it means the opposite of paranoia: it’s the belief that the world is conspiring to work in your favour.

I’m still trying to wrap my head around living this way. But I do believe that we can write this way, because the truth is that the world is most definitely conspiring to help us write.

First, we’ve been given the gift of written language. How incredible is it that we can use more than one alphabet to communicate with each other? If we have trouble finding the right word in one tongue, we’re sure to find it in another.

Look at all the implements that exist just to help us write. We’ve got pens, pencils, paper, markers, whiteboards and computers. Whatever our preferred method of writing, there’s something out there to accommodate us. An additional bonus of living in this day and age is that computers make revising and editing easier than ever. Imagine having to do all of that with a quill and parchment. No, thank you. (Unless a magic wand and trip to Hogwarts are included, then yes please.)

This is just the beginning, though. Feel you lack knowledge in a certain area? That’s life conspiring to get you to broaden your horizons and expand your mind, all so that you can then write about what you learned.

Is there a story in your head that just won’t go away? There’s a reason for that. And it won’t leave until you get it down on the page. So start writing.

Lucky enough to have internet access? Oh boy, is pronoia ever working on your behalf. You can do research, find an audience and connect with other writers, all from the comfort of your own home.

Then there’s the issue of subject matter. If you ever needed definitive proof that the world is conspiring to help us write, this is it. There is a never-ending wealth of topics out there, and we are only limited by our imagination.

You can write about your life – the high points, the low points, your frustrations, triumphs and dreams. You can write about other people’s lives. You can write fiction. You can write non-fiction. You can write poems, songs and essays. You can write about what you see around you: people, places, animals and things. You can write from the perspective of inanimate objects, animals and plants. Why not? These things have been given to us by life to exercise and stretch our imagination. Human beings aren’t the only ones with stories to tell.

And this list isn’t even scratching the surface of what we can write about.

The conspiracy is real. Just because you’re not cultivating pronoia doesn’t mean the world isn’t out to help you. Everywhere you look, life is conspiring to help you write: by providing inspiration, instruction, implements, topics and assistance. All you have to do is get the words down on the page.

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This week’s prompts

Use the following prompts to start a new piece, continue an existing one, or to just have fun with words.

1. There was a face in the tree trunk…
2. The coffee machine exploded and the next thing I knew…
3. The nicest thing a family member/friend ever did for me was…
4. “Oh great, it’s you again,” he said…
5. The tiny seed rolled…

Questions? Suggestions? Feel free to drop me a line any time at zee@twomarshmallows.net. You can also follow or contact me via Facebook, Linked In, YouTube or Tumblr.